If Every Country Were a Guest at a Big Party, What Would They Be Doing?

Many people have made funny videos about how countries would behave if they were individuals. Often, you’ll find the U.K. as the privileged snobby kid with a white-collar job, Canadians as the overly friendly, animated character, and Americans boasting about being the greatest nation in the world.

Now, imagine if they were all at a party, what would they be doing? Someone posed the question online, and the replies are so hilarious that if you were at that party, you’d never want to leave.

1. Germany

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Numerous people agree with Germany calling the cops at 10:00 pm sharp because of loud music. Come on. Live a little, Germany!

Someone shares a story of once they were in a hotel in Germany, and the staff was having a party. It wasn’t the partying that woke them up, but someone yelling, “This is Dieter. You are in the quiet hour. You must stop your drinking!”

2. Czechia and Slovakia

Czechia and Slovakia
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According to a Czech, “these are the couple that broke up but still spend all their time at the party together.” Can you imagine how awkward that would be, though?

A Slovakian adds, “And after a lot of drinking, they go to the bedroom to ‘have a private conversation,’ and when they come out, they don’t look at each other and go to opposite ends of the party.” Stop it, people.

3. Philippines

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One thinks the Philippines would be “putting the food and drinks in plastic bags to eat at home tomorrow.” That may be accurate, but at least they are not wasting food!

4. Sweden

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Here’s a top-voted response from a Swede: “Sweden is either looking anxiously at their watch, wondering when it’s socially acceptable to go home, or the drunkest person at the party. No in-between.”

Well, you know what they say, you’re a partygoer or a party-pooper. What are you there for if you’re not there to go wild and give the dancefloor body?

5. France

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The French don’t know how to keep it simple, do they? They would keep speaking to their English-speaking peers in French, even when they know English and nobody else knows French. Although, if someone speaks to them in French, they will switch to English. On notes, “Pick a side, France.”

6. Spain

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A Spaniard suggests, “Spain hasn’t even arrived yet, since 22:00’ish is dinner time and good parties don’t start until past 02:00 hours.” Another adds they may get there late and drunk, but the real party doesn’t start until they show up.

7. Finland

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I can’t get over the Finland jokes.”Finland has drank themselves to the point where social awkwardness has been replaced with an urgent need to tell everyone about all the times they beat Sweden in ice hockey,” says one Finn.

A second Finn adds, “Finland is climbing on a statue and singing their national anthem because they heard their name mentioned in a conversation.” In their defense, it’s not every day they get to be the center of attention.

8. Ireland

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You know Ireland is bringing the barrels of beer — although it may be empty by the time they get to the party. “Ireland is having their first pint of Guinness, and everyone is already making fun of them for their ‘drinking problem,'” states one Irish person. Of course, Ireland would then reply, “I don’t have a drinking problem. I have a drinking solution.”

9. Canada

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Ever as polite and kind, Canada would arrive ten minutes early and wait in their car to come in precisely on time because even a minute late might be rude, according to one Canadian. I can’t dispute that.

Canada would also tell you what artists were Canadians. Then, they’d beat their chest and say with glee, “Drake, Carly Rae Jepsen, and Justin Bieber.”

10. Mexico

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Finally, a Mexican explains Mexico would make amazing tacos while trying to approach America. Come on, America. They’ve been going at it every year, at every party. Don’t just awkwardly sit back and accept their amazing tacos. “Invite them over at some point.”

This thread inspired this article.

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