Suppose your 17-year-old daughter wanted to travel across the country to check out a potential university. Would you support her or confiscate her cell phone?
Recently, a 40-year-old dad, who we’ll call Chuck, shared that his daughter, Megan, is exploring five options for universities to attend. Chuck explained that Megan is brilliant and “is target A*AA at her A-Levels for context.”
One of her choices is in the South of the U.K. She wanted to visit to see the university and city. Chuck believes it is pointless. He doesn’t think she needs a safety school, as the university grades for her course would be “BBC and well below the level she’s working at right now.”
Chuck wants to avoid Megan placing that as an option because he feels it’s not a good university for her with such low entrance requirements. However, she was adamant about seeing it, so she booked her train tickets and hotel room.
Check suggested, “Megan is not in our good books at the moment,” referring to him and his wife. They argued with Megan for making plans with friends without their permission and going ahead despite telling her that she could not.
As a result, Chuck took her sim and phone, which are still in our possession. Megan attempted to tell them that she needed her phone to travel with for safety.
So they suggested she ask her friends for a sim and a phone since they are such “great friends.” So Megan went down South and got back home safely. Her friends bought her a phone and sim to travel so they could stay in contact.
Now, Megan is refusing to talk to her parents and is staying with her grandma, Chuck’s mother. She’s refusing to come home, and grandma won’t allow him to speak to Megan because she believes they made a mistake as parents regarding our child’s safety.
Grandma believes it should always come first, and they should apologize to Megan. However, Chuck doesn’t think he and his wife did anything wrong. So, he asked the internet what they thought. Here is how they responded.
One Clarified the Situation
“Sorry, can I clarify??? So you would rather your daughter travel ACROSS THE COUNTRY without any way to contact help or keep herself safe because you wanted to prove a pointless point about her “being in your bad books? That’s your kid, and she wasn’t safe traveling without a proper phone. Act like an adult, not a child.”
Another Suggested, Now You Know Why She Wants To Attend a Cross Country School
“Well, now you know why she wants to go to a school across the country, and don’t be surprised once she is there if you don’t hear from her unless she has to. You’re not parenting her. You’re judging her.”
A Third Noted His Parental Ego
“You put your parental ego over your daughter’s safety in this situation. How would you have reacted if something happened to her and she separated from her friends and had no way to contact you?
It is unreasonable to expect someone to rely so heavily on other people for necessities such as having your phone with you. It isn’t the 90s anymore. Do you realize it isn’t the same world you grew up in?”
Finally, One Advised
“Ask yourself what sort of relationship you want with your child. For example, do you want her to be able to come to you if she needs you, or will you continue with your current domineering style?
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17-year-olds will start going out, and there is little you can do to stop it. Do you prefer to know where your daughter is and be able to contact you, or would you prefer that she lies to you about where she is going? It is the route you are going down with your behavior.”
What do you think? Did this Reddit dad surprise you by taking his daughter’s phone, or do you see this father’s point? This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Savoteur.
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