Everyone’s had a job that makes them shake their head in disbelief. One of those gigs where you’ve found yourself secretly Googling “new jobs near me” in between endless spreadsheets or customer complaints. Sure, most of us just serve our notice and skedaddle, but some disgruntled employees? They can’t resist the allure of an unforgettable exit. And boy, do these ex-employees on an internet forum got creative with their final hurrahs.
1. Stinky Time-Bomb
In a legal firm, a young temp felt mistreated by a particularly irksome coworker. Deciding to serve up cold revenge on her last day, she cunningly tucked a bag of shrimp behind the office radiator. As the winter heating kicked in, a stinky smell began to waft around, leaving everyone wondering where it came from.
It took weeks for people to discover the decaying seafood, forcing the unpleasant coworker to vacate. Relishing in her petty triumph from afar, the commenter who was also the temp remarked, “…guess what, I’m not ashamed.”
2. Bossing on a Ketchup Pack
Contributing to the thread, one user recounts an encounter where their brother, unhappy with the treatment meted on him by his employer, decided the pettiest way to get at him was to poke tiny holes in a ketchup pack and put it on his boss’s office chair.
A second contributor sarcastically asks if “the boss closed his eyes while sitting down.” It is hard to imagine the employer’s disgust when he found out.
3. If I Leave, You Leave
One ex-employee narrates how her employer deliberately throws food on the floor and asks her to clean it up. She explains that she refused to clean the mess up one day, and he laid her off in a show of superiority.
Her revenge? She showed him proof of his affair with another co-worker on the premises and how she would happily hand the news to the head office. It turned out the scared manager not only gave her her job back; he also added a week’s free holiday as a bonus.
4. All the Cutlery in the Bin
Exhausted of wrapping cutlery in a spoon kitchen, one Whetherspoon ex-employee shares the story of a co-worker who, one day, having had enough of the high-stress, low-paying gig, mid-way into his shift, decided to throw all the cutlery in the bin before slamming the door behind him.
5. A Punch for a Bullet It Is
Someone describes how they buried their employer’s land cruiser beneath a 20-ton tiny stone pit for failing to pay them for 1000 dollar worth of work. It seems to me like shooting your puncher in the face.
6. This Is How I Want You To Remember Me
Although this employee is said to have left on good terms, a co-worker describes how he printed tiny pics of Ainsley Harriot (An English Chef and a Television Presenter) of about 3 x 2 cm, sticking them around loads of places in the organization.
There’s a tiny Harriot when you open the drawer, the phone battery pack, the ceiling, under the desk, and just about anywhere else.
7. The Office Supplies Go With Me
After being made redundant by a company that sold their job to a new firm, the new company moved to another city. This user couldn’t believe they’ll have to move for a 15k job, so they decided to empty the supply store of just about anything in sight.
8. If I Don’t Make Money, You Don’t Make Zilch
One user who was declared surplus to requirement in a video rental concession in 1988 shares how they got replaced by a vending machine and were asked to spend three days showing customers how to use it.
This generous employee did not stop at explaining to customers how to use the vending machine but also how to get free tapes by poking the slot with a ruler. In a week, the store was empty, but there was little to no cash for the owner in the drawer.
9. Have Fun With an Empty Drive
One thread contributor says they felt unappreciated in their former job after being short of $7K in bonuses.
They were surprised the management they had helped to profit grew terse when they said they were leaving, so they formatted the hard drive and peeled off the Windows license before literally throwing the middle finger on their way out of the door.
10. Your Vehicle Is on a Trunk Road
Fed up with their 9-5, someone describes the utter ruthlessness with which they drove the company’s car till it ran out of fuel and then “got it towed to a lay-by on the A14” before sending the keys and fuel card back to the office with the note, “Come pick your car on the highway. I’m so done!”
11. All the Emails and Calls to My Ex-Boss’s Desk
One user gave their ex-bosses personal number and email address to anyone who cared to cold call them for just about anything. They also told the recruiter that their boss was exploring whatever they were selling and that their timing was impeccable.
We can’t imagine what the world the boss lived in, suddenly having to answer hundreds of unsolicited calls and texts every day of the week.
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