Is this petty? Recently, a man we’ll call Bryce bought a home for him and his fiancée, who we’ll call Sasha. However, the house is in his name because he put up all the money. Sasha agreed to give him $600 monthly (about 30% of the total) while also splitting utilities. “We usually split most expenses 50/50.”
In November 2022, Sasha said she didn’t like the cold weather and wanted to spend some time with her parents in the South, where he visited her twice. However, because she wasn’t living there in December and January, she doesn’t believe she owes him 50% of the utilities.
Bryce admits that he would have just rolled over and paid it all himself in the past. However, he has a meager income, only $24k last year, since he is working on his family business and earning sweat equity.
His fiancée makes over $95k with benefits at a corporate job working remotely. He shared, “She bought a new car, took her mom to Cancun, and has significant savings. I have never asked for or expected $1 over 50% of shared expenses.”
Bryce explained that utilities are too much, and he’s replaced all light bulbs with LED, keeps his thermostat at 62 degrees, and is at work and away from home for over ten hours daily.
He also had to sell stock in his retirement portfolio to cover bills last month. Bryce said he can’t afford groceries and often takes home leftovers from work for dinner.
Bryce describes it’s been a severe struggle but believes in their vision and path to success. Additionally, he’s planning on renting the home as an Airbnb or even a bedroom out. He explained that he spent last year fixing the house up but can’t rent it while his fiancée’s stuff is there.
Finally, Bryce declared that she reluctantly agreed to give him $600 for rent. But only after subtracting $200 for a rental car he “never wanted” and nothing extra for utilities. She called him pathetic for even asking for money and said, “this says a lot about you as a man.”
Bryce wonders if he is wrong for expecting her to pay the utilities for the two months she wasn’t home or if the internet sees his logic and reasoning. Here is how they responded.
It Doesn’t Sound Like a Good Partnership
Somebody stated, “She’s your fiancée – the pair of you should be financially working together, doing what’s best for both of you.
Although, with respect, this doesn’t sound like much of a partnership if she’s living the high life while you’re freezing and starving. You’re not wrong now, but you will be if you marry her before finding a fairer way to sort your finances.”
Toxic Sense of Masculinity
A second agreed, “You moved in with a plan that she’s not honoring. I think you need to break up and rent the room at market rates and get a girlfriend who doesn’t call you pathetic and has some toxic sense of masculinity.”
She Doesn’t Want To Live There
A third suggested, “You all should not have moved in together. Your fiancée doesn’t want to live in this area in the future, so it makes sense that she wouldn’t want to pay for a house there. You should have been on the same page together because it sounds like you will be in this area long term.
However, she sucks because she should still be paying utilities. So, no, she wasn’t there, but you still pay utilities on your place if you go on vacation. Good luck with your relationship because you all resent each other.”
She Is Right
One said, “The house is entirely in your name. She has no equity in the home. Her paying you for the rent is fair enough, but she doesn’t owe you for utilities during the months she isn’t there.”
She Is NOT!
Finally, one argued, “She LIVES THERE. Just because you go on a trip doesn’t mean you don’t pay rent or essential utilities for your shared living quarters. That isn’t how it works in an apartment you rent. So why would it be different in a house you live in and contribute to, really?
What do you think? Is this Redditor right for expecting his fiancée to hold up her end of the bargain, or is he a petty man? This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Savoteur.